Sunday, April 27, 2008

Does God Want Me to Be a Loaf?

As you read this (if it is Sunday, that is), the Nespys will be on their way back home to Savannah from Orlando. I sure we will have had a wonderful time visiting close friends and reluctant to leave them, as we don't get to see them often. In the meantime, as we travel down the highway, speeding no doubt, and burning some expensive gasoline, I will leave you this to read:

Today I will drift from my usual subject matter. Today I will ponder in writing what I should do. If you don't want to read about a matter that I have been dealing with in my spiritual life, feel free to skip today's post, as tomorrow I will be back on my usual topic.

I really feel that God has been leading me to teach or lead. Not as a profession, mind you, but just in some capacity. The obvious lead was at church to lead women's groups or such--and it may lead to that as well or in the end, but right now I'm wondering if I should start another blog that would be a teaching/learning tool for both me and readers. Frequently when I am reading my Bible or just going through my life experiences, I think of things that I would like to share, but I have no one to share them with (in a teaching type environment). It is nothing that really fits the context of this blog, but creating a new one is a real possibility. Nespy would probably think I was crazy, as he (and I sometimes) think this one is becoming a bit of an obsession from time to time.

However, would you be interested in reading it (yes, I realize the topics would really influence if you read or stayed around)? Do you think God would ask me to write a blog? I am really nobody and have no training to teach His Word. However, that is really not an argument, as He is FREQUENTLY calling the lowly to teach and lead (shepherds as kings and fishermen as the foundation of Christianity?!). Then I think that I would be scared to death to do it. Wouldn't I be responsible for everything that I typed and how it might influence others? Would my faults get in the way of His glory? It would be so easy to let my shortcomings get in the way.

"How could I make a difference?" I asked Him one day. Then I thought I heard Him speak to me through a Biblical account that I learned as a child in Sunday School and have heard about over and over again throughout my life.

There are two occasions where Jesus fed huge crowds with fishes and loaves. You can see Jesus reference both in Mark 8:19-20. Jesus took just a meal for a few and fed thousands upon thousands with it. He took a little and provided for many with it. That's how He works. He takes a little and multiplies it for His glory. He fed those who were hungry. Is he calling me to be His instrument to do the same? Is He calling me to be a loaf?

Photo credit: in the shadow of za'ha'dum


  1. I, like you, felt God's calling a few years ago to step up and lead. Now I am the Assistant Womens Director at our church. Just in the last few months, I have felt God calling me to Teach as well. Now I already teach 2 Womens Bible Studies but I feel like God is calling me into something different. I talked with my pastor and have been concentrating on Bible Study and writing down my thoughts and notes that I could use in a "speech" if need be.
    So, yes, I think God may be calling you to teach, and the blog may just be the first step. He may use that as "your training" and bounce you from there into something even bigger.
    I would say PRAY, PRAY, PRAY....and seek the counsel of your pastor. Continue to listen for His direction and He will lead you into unknown possiblities.

  2. I think God wants us all to be loafs. Now the manner in which that happens is different for each of us. I've found that prayer, fasting and digging into scripture are the surest ways to clearly hear His calling. I wish you continued success along the journey, wherever He may be leading you.

  3. I think if more of us took the time to serve God in any capacity, even writing when we consider ourselves a small voice, I think it is a good thing. We have to let Him be the judge on what is small.